EVIL SHALL NO LONGER REIGN ON MY BLOG

I am one of those people who infuse inanimate objects with human-like attributes. The more understanding I have of something, the less I humanize it. When I don’t understand, I consider the thing to be … reluctant, stupid, sulky, temperamental or in sever cases, EVIL. I know a whole lot about some things. Like cooking and cotton! Therefore I rarely use the term “evil”, when talking about them. At work, my co-workers, program, create and deploy web-pages, and use html. I, on the other-hand, excel at installing software programs, teaching people how to populate the programs with data, how to operate them, and get the data OUT of them. Not to mention I am the “queen” of custom reports and fixing corrupted data. I was anxious to participate in this new exciting world of blogging. To write, express my feelings, improve my communication skills, and deploy my sarcastic wit with others - what a wondrous place! I have noticed there is little about a blog which deals with cooking or cotton. The previously mentioned programming, and html’ing seem to be a significant portion. The wonder is a little less bright these days. My blog resembles a young child’s first exposure to dress-up. Everything in the closet and makeup drawer must be put on and worn at once. Look! Look! A feather boa! A smashing fedora hat AND sky-high pointy red heels! Oh and look at the LOVELY blue eye shadow. It will really draw attention to my dangly earrings! So here am I. Look, Look! A blogroll, I must try it on! A site counter! See the sparkly Froogle List! Doesn’t this archive flatter me? WELL MAYBE, if I knew how to make them all WORK with each OTHER. In my “100-things” list I confessed my proclivity for procrastination. I’m also a devotee of the, “Don’t look at it and maybe it will fix itself”, theory. Unfortunately it appears to be a flawed theory. The combination of these two tendencies have been employed on my blog since September 9th. When somehow I managed to make my blog enteries From Months Ago Start way down here and then wrap around and around … and look very unattractive when viewed with Mozilla-Foxfire. Several times I tried to make the blog behave. Of course I did copy the offending template and save it after it was screwed up! (I guess employing half a helpful hint is better than complete disregard, right?) Again and again I would attempt to fix the blog, only to have all the cool things disappear (like my posts), or the counter s-p-r-e-a-d a-c-r-o-s-s t-h-e s-i-d-e b-a-r margin into the post! Time is at a premium these days … and I certainly don’t have time to mess with things I don’t understand! (Overbooking my time is another bad habit of mine). Availing myself to people I work with who know a whole lot about web-page “stuff” isn’t an option since I don’t want my rants about work to be discovered. I did cry on another bloggers’ shoulder http://wouldashoulda.com// and she so kindly sent me the secret to “expand and collapse” (Thank you Mir). But I’ve been afraid to try it before I get the other “experiments” tamed. I was hoping I was the only one noticing how UNFORGIVING Mozilla is, but noooooo! Edgy-Mama http://www.edgymama.com/ came by and paid me a visit … and I knew I couldn’t avoid it too much longer. TA-DA! Look, Look! EVIL SHALL NO LONGER REIGN ON MY BLOG. I fixed it ALL on my own! How? I have no frggin’ clue! Yet another case where persistence pays off. This whole “persistence pays off” gig is also illustrative of my whole professional career. Eventually I get it right. But I’m slower than those who’ve been formally taught, and sometimes I’m not sure how I’ve ended up with the right answer … BUT I HAVE THE RIGHT ANSWER, so must we mess with the details? Now a brief message about my life outside of the blog-page. The Red Beans and Rice dinner party was a success. They thought I was soooo cleaver for using the Mardi Gras beads as napkin rings. They raved over the food. (The fact that I served Mint Juleps with the Shrimp Picayune appetizer, or had two bottles of a kicky Zinfandel for the main meal has NO BEARING on their perceptions I’m sure.) This week work is good. Two weeks ago Friday it wasn’t so good. Actually the last week of October was a “Broil the fingers” and “burn my bridges” type of week. I am happy to report fingers heal from 2nd degree burns and bridges can be rebuilt … but salaries still are not restored! Also looming on the horizon is a case of “Oh my God, did I really say “YES”? The exact nature of this panic attack is directly linked to my agreement to COOK DINNER FOR EIGHTY PEOPLE. Okay, it is true, I have done jobs this scale or bigger, and this is something I am capable of … even if I’m not a professional cook. It’s even something I am good at. But in NOVEMBER? On a FRIDAY? During the cotton harvest? Am I daft? A glutton for punishment? Apparently YES. Stand-by for more upcoming details of my Rehearsal Dinner gig. I am happy to report I am not completely at a loss. I established a preview menu, held a “tasting” dinner for the bride and groom and their parents. We’ve finalized the menu. Mixed Greens with dates and goat cheese, Pork Medallions with a Sour Cherry Port Sauce, Zucchini Sticks under a Parmigiano-Reggiano Canopy and Rosemary Roasted Potatoes will be served for the main course. Dessert will consist of two slivers of Espresso Mascarpone Icebox Cake and Fallen Chocolate Soufflé garnished with whipped cream, raspberries, and mint leaves. Now I only have to shop for the food, round up 10 spring-form pans, do prep cooking on Wednesday and Thursday, and find about 20 people who will help me expedite, serve, and clean up after the meal on Friday. Fortunately this dinner is for the Associate Minister of my church and a whole lot of people like him and his wife-to-be. I have asked specific members of the congregation to assist me as a “Love Offering” … and have had a good response so far. Was I able to leave it at the dinner of eighty? NOOOOOO. If I can do dinner for 80, I can also prepare the CHURCH-WIDE Reception on the following week, can’t I. Please do not tell me to say NO. It’s too late. Thankfully it’s at 3 o’clock on a Sunday afternoon. So a few light hors d’oeuvres should do the trick. Here too I already have a menu outlined and help lined up. Please pray for me ….