Cookin’ not talkin’

I cooked something amazing the other night … and I thought about writing about it … but I didn’t. And now I don't remember what I cooked.

Maybe it was the soy/maple glazed pork chops that I grilled – w/apricot/ginger/cinnamon/brown mustard seed/and star anise spiked couscous.

Or – the apricot/whiskey/pork chops, or the orange marmalade crushed red pepper pork chops with … roasted rosemary potatoes (yawn). (yes ... I eat a lot of pork!)

Or – I did lemon/ricotta spaghetti with rocket (because I couldn’t find arugula) as a one dish meal.  And it was yum.

This last Friday I made this roasted pork loin w/herbs (although it calls for tenderloin) and this cauliflower (which will now be making an appearance @ Thanksgiving). I mean, roasted cauliflower w/herb & cheese … I was a hero on Friday night … even though I didn’t show up ‘till 7:10pm – and we ate a little after 8pm.

But tonight – I’ll write about my two “no recipe” experiments that turned out … really good.

I bought skinless boneless chicken breasts the other night (although if I were to do this again, I think I’d want skin on … and I bet you could roast/broil them) … and then I had all the herbs (tarragon, thyme, and parley) left over from the cauliflower … plus the parmesan.

So I slit a pocket in the breast – stuffed it with the minced herb/cheese mixture – and seasoned the outside w/salt and pepper (d’uh).  I sautéed them in a pan with butter/olive oil.

While that was going on – I diced a shallot – and sautéed it in butter in a medium sauce pan w/butter. Then I dumped in some almond slivers and couscous (Israeli) … and toasted them. When all was golden I added thyme – and chicken stalk. Let it simmer until the moisture was absorbed (so ½ cup couscous & ¾ cup chicken stock) then added ½ cup of diced dried sour cherries and Italian parsley. Fork fluffed/mixed together and served.

Not a bad meal. I think with the left-over breasts I’ll sauté some eggplant slices – and then dress the chicken w/some crusted tomato sauce w/basil and parmesan … hello Italian night.   

Uncomfortably Squishy

Ok … here goes. I’m going to tell all. (Some of you think I’ve always told all … but really, it’s just that I don’t have a filter.)

Or maybe, it’s what YOU think is important/sacrosanct … isn’t what *I* think is sacrosanct and important.) (OMG … ALREADY … TWO SENENTENCES IN, I HAVE A DIGRESSION)

So!  … Now we know why people have different personalities – and disagreements – and start political/cultural/religious wars!!! (You’re welcome! For providing this obvious insight. Please send your millions of dollars in gratitude for unraveling this mystery to “MitMoi”)

So what I’m really going to tell you are those things that *I* DO filter … that maybe *YOU* wouldn’t. (And in the process … maybe admitting I am human, and fallible … and … “imperfect”) (squirms) (endlessly)

One of my biggest fears in life was being laid off.

OMG!!! If you are important … and GOOD AT WHAT YOU DO … and work hard, “You will always be employed and successful.” (So says the Bible according to Mit)

Wait … “If you are good at what you do … and work hard … AND KISS BUTT … (or play politics, swallow your tongue (or someone’s dick)) … you will always be employed and successful.” (So says the Bible of the “shallow”) (or “fake”) (or “unethical”) (OR ANYONE WHO IS NOT ME)

AND … no matter what, you HAVE TO BE SMART.

Like you can do MATH … and spell. And understand punctuation. Extra points for 4.0+ GPAs and taking “Honors and AP Courses.”

PLUS … you must be NICE.

And never be SARCASTIC. Or talk “bad” about people (even if you are pointing out their OBVIOUS flaws/shortcomings).

And … you must be “WEIGHT APPROPRIATE FOR HEIGHT”.

If you are not, it’s only logical that you are:

1.       Under-employed

2.       Unhappy

3.       Single

4.       Not … (okay … I’m thinking Donald Trump and Martha Stewart aren’t really the icon’s I want to present here) … THAT PERSON WHO HAS IT ALL!! And is successful and HAPPY, HAPPY, HAPPY!!!

So … here is me.

1. I work hard. (Maybe more than necessary)
2. I was (according to rumor) good at what I did
3. AND I BECAME UNEMPLOYED.

WHY??!?

1. I am not smart (or I can’t do simple math, spell, or punctuate sentences correctly) … And have never had a good (ie: more than a 3.0) GPA! (which clearly indicates I was never  an “Honors” or “AP” student)
2. I am not NICE. I might do nice things for people, but I am NOT “nice”. (or sweet) (or kind) (or thoughtful)
3. OH HELL YES … I AM sarcastic (Seriously. You are SHOCKED, aren’t you? You NEVER knew!)
4. And I am not “height appropriate to weight”. (In fact, I’m sure "some people" would say, 80% of my life would be better if I wasn’t “fat”.)  (This isn’t the same (in my opinion) as obese.) BUT STILL – it’s true … I am not a size 6. Or 12. Or even 16.

So … I found myself unemployed. And it SHOULD HAVE BEEN “the worst time ever”, right?

I mean, I should have lost my house, declared bankruptcy, and moved home.

But none of those things happened.

I had a part time (okay – I worked full time, but only billed part-time) job … COOKING AS A CHEF!!!

I had lots of “meetings”, and “To-do Lists”, and “goals” and “deadlines” … and I WAS MY OWN BOSS

And somehow I made enough (plus unemployment) to pay my mortgage and not become bankrupt. (or add any loan/credit card debt to my situation).

AND THEN I GOT A JOB!!! In a NEW INDUSTRY … that isn’t cyclical like agriculture! An industry that was EXPANIDNG!!! … And not “historical” … or part of the “good old boy” network.

And even though I agreed to a salary (what choice did I have?) at 50% less than I was making … 3 years ago … and even LESS than I was making in … 1997 … IT WAS A JOB! And it had POTENTIAL! (Right?)

And all the problems I’d run into previously … in that “good-old-boys” world … were because of that! Right? THIS new job was going to be PERFECT!

Only? It’s not.

And so what does that mean?

1. I am ungrateful
2. I am incompetent
3. I cannot keep my big mouth shut (ok, this IS true)
4. I … am a failure?
5. I’m not that smart?
6. I’m doomed because I cannot act “normally”?
7. I am broken

And you know what I hate MOST about other people?!?

1. People who don’t recognize their “shit” and blame all that’s bad in their life on “someone/something” else and don’t take responsibility for what they can control/change.
2. And people who whine. (GOD, DO I HATE WHINERS!)
3. And people who are NEGATIVE
4. HYPOCRATES

GUESS WHO I AM THESE DAYS?!?

So … what have I done?

1. Worked harder (close to 50/60 hours a week)
2. Ended all extra circular activities (because I am BROKE … and ALWAYS working)
3. Stopped socializing (because I am a loser). And negative. And if I open my mouth, I’ll whine.
4. Pushed all the interesting/fun/unusually interests/hobbies out of my life … because “social” = spending money. Or being … optimistic. (Or not a shrew)

And what does this mean?

1.       I am broken

2.       I don’t know how to fix myself

3.       I am unhappy

4.       I am scared

5.       I am … I dunno. Not successful. Not financially secure. Not … MIT/me

And there’s probably a whole lot more. (There is). But this is 1,022 words too revealing, so I’m going to stop.

One last thing. I have an opportunity (or two) … to look in someone’s face … and lay this all out … and “work on it” ... which means … change. And admit I am not right/in-charge/perfect. I dunno if I can go there. Which is why I’ve written this.

Because THIS is logic, right?

And who wants to be a fool? (Broken person/idiot/loser) 

Little Steps

It's been a while. At the moment I am procrastinating. So I thought I'd include you. This is a weekly meme. "You say, I think."

1. Girlfriend :: too much effort
2. Crushed :: ice
3. Source :: of frustration
4. Corner :: market
5. Gossip :: girl
6. Encounter :: of the 3rd Kind
7. Make an offer :: Have it refused
8. Stylish :: Audry Hepburn
9. Profit :: Loss
10. Waste :: water

Best Pasta Ever ...

or I was really hungry.


It was also really, really quick to throw together.


I boiled some fettuccine - but you could use anything.
Conchiglie - (pasta shells) or orecchiette would also work.


In a pan with a little olive oil I caramelized some onions and pine nuts. I cut the onion in long
slices instead of a dice. At the very end I added some big chunks of garlic.


When the pasta was almost done, I took about a 1/4 cup of the pasta
water - and poured it over some crumbled feta cheese - and then
stirred. This became part of the sauce.


I had grape tomatoes I sliced in half - about 1 cup or 4oz. And also a
1/4 cup or so of chiffonaded basil.


After I drained the pasta, I put it back into the pasta pot.


Dumped the feta/water into the pasta and stirred, stirred, stirred, until I had a creamy sauce. (Don't expect a thick fake Alfredo sauce - this is a thin sauce, but packs a nice flavor punch)


Then I added the toms and the olive oil/onion/pine nut/garlic
mixture.


Finally I added the basil.


A few cranks of the pepper mill - and some sea salt - and dinner was on!


Pasta w Feta Cheese Sauce Tomatoes & Pignoles


Serves 2


10 cups water - well salted


1/2 lb pasta




1 tsp Olive Oil


1/2 cup sliced onion


1/4 cup pignoles (pine nuts)


2 large cloves garlic - rough chop


1 cup sliced grape tomatoes


1/4 cup basil - cut into a chiffonade


1/4-1/2 teaspoon freshly ground pepper


1/4 teaspoon sea salt (or Kosher salt)


Bring salted water to boil - add pasta.


Cook 8-9 minutes (or until al dente)


While water comes to a boil & pasta is cooking:
Sautee onions in olive oil over medium low heat (you want them to slowly cook and caramelize)
When there's 4 minutes left before the pasta is done, add pignoles to onion mixture


Before draining pasta remove & reserve 1/2 cup of pasta water


Drain pasta & return to pasta pot


Add feta cheese to the pot - and pasta water 1 Tbls at a time


Stir until sauce develops - maybe mashing a few of the bigger crumbles


While stirring feta/pasta add garlic to onion/pine nut mixture


Add sliced grape tomatoes to pasta/feta, then add sauté mixture


Mix well


Add pepper - correct salt level


Serve!

Food Wednesday - Change!

Did you miss me?

It's been busy.

I'll just let you stare at this new look - and return later with something about food.