You won’t understand any of this. That is ok. I am not going to explain.
Okay – that's a lie. I’ll explain one little part. There’s a book going around like a rash. It seems to be quoted everywhere I look. I wanted to despise it. But it talks about food. And praying. And love. You might have to endure a lot of excerpts in the weeks to come. I apologize now. Sorry.
“He was a character I had invented, which is somewhat telling. In desperate love, it’s always like this, isn’t it? In desperate love, we always invent the characters of our partners, demanding that they be what we need of them, and feeling devastated when they refuse to perform the role we created in the first place.”
“… and that’s when I saw the other side of my passionate romantic hero – the David who was as solitary as a castaway, cool to the touch, in need of more personal space than a heard of American bison.”
“So when … [I was] asked … what I really wanted, I found … truer words.”
“I want to have a lasting experience with God.” “Sometimes I feel like I understand the divinity of this world, but then I lose it because I get distracted by my petty desires and fears. I want to be with God all the time. But I don’t want to be a monk, or totally give up worldly pleasures. I guess what I want to learn is how to live in this world and enjoy it’s delights, but also devote myself to God.”
“…he … answer[ed] my question with a picture. It was an androgynous human figure, standing up, hands clasped in prayer. But the figure had four legs, and no head. Where the head should have been there was only a wild foliage of ferns and flowers. There was a small, smiling face drawn over the heart.”
“To find the balance you want … this is what you must become. You must keep your feet grounded so firmly on the earth that it’s like you have four legs, instead of two. That way you can stay in the world. But you must stop looking at the world through your head. You must look through your heart, instead. That way, you will know God.”
Hijacked from “Eat, Pray, Love” by Elizabeth Gilbert.
Ps: I went to the gym today. I am going again in the morning. I will become disciplined in this too.