It's the Little Things

I haven’t lost my red-headed temper with anyone involved in the lost bad episode. I’ve remained cheerful, if sarcastic, throughout my interactions with airline and hotel staff. When the hotel 50 miles away confirmed they had my bag, I was grateful my luggage was no longer lost, even though it remained 50 miles away. Last night after locating the bag, it was too late and I was too tired, to go shopping for basics to take me through one more day. So, early this morning I headed out for Hel-Mart. My list was short; a blouse, pair of pants, socks, underwear, bra, base makeup, loose powder and lipstick. Of course I knew what I wanted wouldn’t be available. I was just hoping for something useful. The pants are cut lower than I’d ever wear, and they’re too long (an unusual circumstance). The top is ok but not warm for this cold spring weather. Don'tcha know, the merchandize in the stores is "spring and summer". Who needs WARM clothes for the last weekend in March? It took two trys to find “something”. I kept telling myself to “shut-up” – as the inner voice in my head kept repeating how cheap/ugly/sloppy everything looked. As I took off my turtleneck to try on the last blouse, I heard something “ping” on the floor. I realized immediately it was my earring. I looked on the ground – no earring. I looked on the bench – no earring. Completing my wardrobe selection, I opened the door of the dressing room. No earring on the floor. (I was hoping it had bounced under the door). I asked the clerk sitting right in front of the door is she’d seen it. She hadn’t. I looked in the changing room to the right. No earring. I tried to look in the handicapped changing room to the left – it was locked. The clerk looked for, and eventually found, the key – we unlocked the door – nothing. Both of us got down on our hands and knees and saw – nothing. The clerk walked around on the other side of the partitions – nothing. I went to the makeup section and found the most inexpensive stuff to “make do”. The brand is “Jane”. As in “PLAIN JANE”. Next I headed on over to the underwear section. I know there are millions of women who love shopping. Not me. I know many women have bra and panty fetishes. REALY.NOT.ME! Shopping is no fun when your body isn’t proportional – sleeves are never long enough, pants are too short and the back gaps open, pockets bulge. I would never dare to buy something without trying it on first. No internet shopping or catalogue shopping for me – because my lovely body is not size consistent. After 10 minutes trying to find a bra in the proper size, I settled for something too small around the chest, but with the correct cup size. Next on the list: underwear. I grabbed the first package of cotton underwear in the right size and scooted toward the checkout. Total monetary damage for stuff I’ll never wear again? $61.00. Reasonable, I’m sure … if I weren’t in a financial straight-jacket. I just see it as $61.00 dollars WASTED. I kept telling myself I had no choice – I couldn’t wear THE SAME CLOTHES for a third day, it’s reasonable, but still I’m angry inside. As I left the store, I was almost in tears – and angry with myself for being so. There have been many frustrating experiences in the last three days. But what sets me off? The little meaningless thing of loosing the stupid earring! I only wear two pairs of earrings. This pair is a heavy polished pewter ellipsis – simplistic and elegant in design. I paid a lot for them from a custom jeweler. Now I have one. I can’t afford to replace them. I keep telling myself I should have known better than to buy clothes while on the road. The last time I did, back in 2002, I lost a ring in Alabama. It was a gift in 1987 from a boyfriend. A gift with no strings attached. It too, was a simple in design. It had one pearl – and two small diamonds on either side of the pearl. The ends of the band paralleled each other to create the prongs to hold the pearl and diamonds. It was an unusual setting – one I got numerous compliments on over the years. I was once again on a business trip and went on a spring shopping spree at Dillard’s. My plan was to shop, go see a movie, and then head to church. After finding some great items, I hurried to put my purchases in the car trunk. In the process a hanger caught on the ring on my hand. I heard something go “ting” but thought nothing of it. I slammed the trunk shut, jumped in the car and drove across the mall parking lot to the theater. In the movie theater I slid into my seat in the dark, and put away my change. Again I heard something fall to the floor – and at the same time realized my ring was no longer on my finger. I searched in the darkened movie house for my ring – and came up empty handed. When the movie finished and the lights came back on, I searched again for the ring again. Still nothing. It was night when I left the movie and I drove back to the empty Dillard’s parking lot. Having no idea where I’d actually parked, I searched the general area I remembered parking. I never found the ring. The ring wasn’t worth much – it was the sentimental value that made it precious to me. The pearl was replaced in 1999 – when I helped friends plan/organize their wedding and cook the rehearsal meal. The ring and earring are now linked in my mind. It’s a lesson I never learn. Don’t value anything, because if you do, you’ll loose it. It’s the little things that cause dispare.